How to show your cat that you love her: 10 proven ways

Many owners contact the editors of the Murkotiki website with the question of how you can show a cat that you love it, and do cats feel the love of their owner? There are techniques that can be used for this purpose. They involve the use of a cat's "language". However, every owner must come to terms with the fact that cats understand love differently than humans. For them this is a special disposition, trust, affection towards someone. This is exactly what we will show our pet.

Creating an atmosphere of safety

First of all, a loving owner should know that the pet will begin to fully interact with new people only if it feels safe. Therefore, first of all, comfort and the so-called “cotification” of the home - and only secondly, social interaction. Cats are territorial creatures, not pack creatures. Therefore, it is very important for them to first feel at ease. The “catification” of space involves, first of all, equipping a cat base camp. We talk about what this is and how to arrange it as part of the course at the Lapa.Expert School of Happy Cat and Dog Owners.

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Quiet voice and high notes

If you want to talk to your pet, you cannot use a low voice; cats perceive it as a sign of aggression. Communicate with them only on high notes. Make sure that your voice is quiet and calm throughout the conversation; there should be no alarming notes in it.

Try to repeat those affectionate sounds that cats themselves use - something like a quiet and short “meaaaaaa” or “mri-i-i-p”. If you are not very good at imitating cat phrases, and the cat confirms this with his wary gaze, stop trying and continue speaking to him in your language.

Soft touch

In humans, love is expressed through kisses and tight hugs, but in cats it is different. They have their own signs. If you speak cat language, you can easily show your pet that you love him. First of all, he should not be grabbed, squeezed or subjected to strong hugs. There is no need to come up and hang on top - it is better to sit down to the cat’s level or lower. In cat language, hovering and squeezing mean a threat and an attack by a large predator on the prey. What kind of love can we talk about then?

Instead, you need to caress the animal gently, stroking the places it exposes. Pay special attention to this. For example, dominant cats hate being stroked on the head from above: it is better for them to scratch their neck. And some cats love it. You need to learn your pet's "erogenous zones" and use only them if you want to give him pleasure.

Trust is the basis of any relationship

If you want to show your cat that you love her, don't shoo her away when she settles down at your feet for the night. During sleep, animals are defenseless, therefore, by settling down to sleep next to them, the cat demonstrates complete trust

, and by accepting it, you show that you love her. But if you are categorically against co-sleeping, teach your pet from the very beginning that the bedroom is taboo and should not be entered there.

If a cat rolls over onto its back and doesn’t mind having its belly stroked, this is a sign of the highest degree of trust, since the animal’s belly is the most vulnerable part of the body. This behavior is characteristic of cats only in relation to close people, but this favor must be used with caution.

Many animals, and cats are no exception, do not like to be looked into the eyes for a long time and intently. But if you slowly close and open your eyes, the cat will perceive such a leisurely blink as a sign of trust and love.

And then your pet will certainly answer you with the same “air kiss”.

These are, in fact, all the ways to show your cat that you are attached to her, love her and care about her. And care is not only friendly communication and signs of love, but also high-quality food, and always fresh water in the drinking bowl, and a comfortable place to rest, and scratching posts, and toys... Of course, with such a life, the cat will feel happy.


In cats, licking means caring. If you start licking your cat (yes, some people do!), she will most likely interpret this sign of affection as kindness. But keep in mind that dominant cats, on the contrary, do not like this, because... among cats, it is accepted that licking is caring for a weaker member of the family by a stronger one. One owner even invented a special device to imitate licking without the help of his own tongue, because you don’t really want to eat bacteria and fur.

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Irishman Jason O'Mara has created a plastic tongue that can be used to lick a cat.

How to communicate with a cat?

First of all, you need to listen to your pet, if he wants to eat, then feed him. By facial expressions it will be clear whether the cat is in a good mood or not. If she comes to you and lies on your knees, chest, or head, then this means that she has come to treat you of your illnesses.

At the same time, the cat purrs intensely and makes a chatter, this can last for several minutes, then the cat will leave and lick its fur, thus throwing off the negative energy that it absorbed from the owner or mistress. There are at least sixteen different sounds that cats make.

Respect for personal space

There are cats that cannot tolerate affection in any form. This does not mean that they do not love their owner. They just have that kind of character. Then you need to understand that the connection between the cat and you is not only affection, but also words, glances, spending time together playing and sleeping, feeding, a feeling of affection from being with each other, not necessarily in the form of hugs and caresses. Respect your cat's personal space and independence. Believe me, he will appreciate this attitude very highly.

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How to understand a cat's behavior?

Teeth clinking is found in the language of cats, but they use it mainly when hunting. Newborn kittens do not have a full range of sounds, so they express their needs with the same sounds, even by crying.

If a person communicates with his pet for a very long time, he tries to understand his facial expressions, gestures and behavior. The owner understands or tries to understand every request of the animal. For example, when a cat wants to eat, she not only meows, but can also show the owner where to go - to the kitchen, to the refrigerator.

You can simply ask what the cat wants. And she will take you where she wants, it could be the toilet, the kitchen, or the bathroom - to drink water.

Soft objects crush you or crush you

When cats trample with their paws, they fall into memories of their mother, of how they drank milk, of course, without realizing it, but only imitating emotional moments. In this process, they are extremely defenseless, so they will only do this when they trust and love their person.

Cats are beautiful creatures and they want human love, and believe me, they also know how to demonstrate it, despite the myths about narcissism, aloofness and independence. No, they love their owners very much .

Photo: pixabay

Don't punish or scare

Cats slowly get used to their owner. To avoid breaking trust, do not punish or frighten the animal. Cats can jump on the table, tear wallpaper and upholstered furniture with their claws - many owners punish troublemakers for such actions. You can’t hit a cat, they can be vindictive, and if the opportunity arises, they will take revenge. A scared cat is a bad companion. If you behave inappropriately, you can call out to the cat in a stern voice; animals understand intonation well. You can slam a newspaper next to the cat - this will be enough for it to understand that you are unhappy with its behavior. Another effective way to wean yourself from walking on the kitchen table is a small spray shower.

The relationship of a cat to a person

There is an assumption that domestic cats, unlike dogs, live with a person under the same roof solely for mercantile motives, evaluating exclusively their own benefit. The opinion is erroneous, since cats with an independent character require love, affection and attention.

Smart animals, with a noble nature, reciprocate the feelings of a person who shows respect and love for their pet.

If the owner does not pay attention to the pet or pet, does not create comfortable conditions for existence, and does not give warmth, you should not count on love from the animal.

It is not difficult to understand that a cat is showing love or sympathizing with its owner. It is enough to carefully observe the habits of the mustachioed rogue. It is recommended to establish contact with a small kitten that appears in the house from the very first days, creating a comfortable environment. An unfamiliar and unusual place is stressful for any cat. Adaptation to new conditions occurs with the help of smell and auditory analyzers. It is necessary that during the adaptation period of a new family member, there are no sharp sounds, and the smells are the most pleasant - favorite food or delicacies.

Feeling safe, the cat will relax and tune in to the right mood, building a relationship with its owner. Rudeness and disrespect towards a cat are not acceptable. The feeling of peace and security that the owner gives to the cat remains with it for life. But how can you understand that a cat considers its owner a friend?

Naturally, a cat’s expression of love is unique. You can understand that a cat has a favorable attitude towards a person and is not averse to making friends with him by carefully observing the behavior and “language” of the body.

Cats use gestures and sounds to express a range of emotions. By paying attention to certain sounds, gestures and behavior, the owner will be able to better understand the mood of his pet.

The main signs indicating the love and affection of a cat for its owner are:

  • loud purring and purring;
  • a kind of head butting when the animal resists to be stroked;
  • unobtrusive hand biting;
  • twitching of the tail when meeting the owner;
  • attempts to be helpful and follow commands, such as fetching toys;
  • characteristic stamping of paws in the process of rumbling;
  • licking the owner’s hands and chin or “cat kisses”;
  • a peaceful long look, with frequent blinking (indicates the cat’s trust in the person);
  • access to the most forbidden places - the cat allows you to stroke its belly;
  • co-sleeping with the owner.


Of course, all pets have different personalities. And some “pranks” can piss off even very calm people. But don’t rush to force yourself. Cats cannot be trained, so you will not achieve educational goals, but rather aggravate the situation. Cats have a good memory and vindictiveness, so displaying aggression can start a protracted war in which there will be no winners.

In a fit of anger, an adult may miscalculate his strength and injure his pet. Once you calm down, you will blame yourself for it, but you will not be able to fix anything. Revenge and physical injury are not the only consequences of human violence. Even if the cat’s health is not in danger, it can suffer psychological trauma and become depressed.

On the other hand, pets are often compared to children. Stop for a second and think. This is a helpless creature that depends on you for shelter, food, and safety. You took it voluntarily and are responsible for it. And if your children (existing or theoretically possible) stood in the place of the cat, would you raise your hand against them?

The only way to raise a cat is with a huge amount of patience, love and affection. By the way, this also works with people.

Don't give your cat too much food

Don't think that the more and more often you feed your cat, the more she will love you. Cats are amazing animals. But still, they are animals. And all the goodies that you put in the bowl will be eaten by your pussy. Through force, to the detriment of the body, but eaten. As the French say: “To be full is to be a little hungry.” Do not overfeed your cat so that she does not immediately go to sleep in her secluded corner.

In addition to quantity, think about the quality of food. Healthy food is the key to a long life and strong friendship for your cat. Cheap food, stuffed with chemicals, can sooner or later cause diabetes, sore joints, or even banal “matts” in a cat. Obese cats groom themselves less frequently and less efficiently.

Pay attention

Cats are by nature solitary animals. But you can’t live alone for long in apartment conditions. Pay attention to the cat! It is not limited to just feeding, although this is a vital part of caring for pets. Feeding adult cats twice a day, at a certain time. Do you want your cat to love you? Take responsibility for feeding your pets. Give your pet treats and you will notice that your cat will communicate with you more. In addition to feeding, play is important for cats.

Understanding behavior

It is not enough for cats to tell us what they are thinking using their tails, ears or various sounds. There is another way to communicate what is on their mind.

  • Lying on your back with your belly exposed: This means your cat trusts you completely and feels comfortable enough to reveal his most vulnerable area to you. But there is a high chance that you will not be able to avoid getting scratched if you dare to pet his belly.
  • Rubbing against various objects: Pets rub against things (or people) to mark their territory in the house using glands located in their cheeks that secrete special pheromones.
  • Massaging with paws: animals only knead people special to them and only when they are very happy and satisfied. Be proud if your cat wants to “knead dough” on your lap!
  • Licks you: If you've earned a special grooming session from your cat, it means a lot. Cats show great affection when they begin to lick your skin, hair, earlobes, or even bite your clothes, viewing you as an important part of the family group.

Once we learn to understand the body language and sounds made by these amazing animals, we are one step closer to understanding their behavior.

Of course, you can treat your cat to various treats as a sign of love. But with this approach, very soon the pet will gain excess weight and may even end up in the clinic.

Some cats adopt our habits and understand that hugging is a sign of affection. But it is best to talk to a cat in its language. Then there will definitely be no misunderstandings!


Even in ancient times, treats served as a sure way to awaken a feeling of affection between cats and humans. Only table scraps then served as tasty treats. Due to the fact that most of the human diet is not suitable for cats due to digestive problems, they should only be treated with treats that are specially produced for this purpose.

In order for your cat to accept you as a friend, it is important to be patient. Control impulses of tenderness, respect personal boundaries and do not forget to treat your pet with tasty treats.

Do cats need human care?

Travelers rarely see small felines in the wild, where they survive and reproduce well in warm climates.

In urban conditions, with a long winter and a poor food supply, it is difficult for them to do without human help, even when there are warm basements.

Cats appreciate caring hands when people pick up helpless kittens from the street and offer to live in a common area. This is their home, they mean it that way, using curtains and sofas instead of trees.

They need to climb to keep their abdominal muscles toned. When there is no alternative in the form of special cat buildings, they “mischief” without malicious intent.

Abandoned food on the table is considered a hunting ground. They do not have the opportunity to independently obtain food within the four walls of the apartment.

Many people are interested in how to understand that a cat loves you. Pets often appear selfish and ungrateful while waiting for an opportunity to reaffirm their love for their owners. The animal greets you at the front door on its hind legs, stretches and lightly scratches the wallpaper.

Pet lovers say that the moments when a cat comes to “chug” and purr are priceless. Even if they don’t catch mice (well-fed cats are not interested), they delight their owners with their playful behavior.

If a pet catches mice and crushes rats, this does not mean that it does not need to be fed. But how can we understand the behavior of cats if they bring “prey” into the house?

They are probably demonstrating that it is not for nothing that they eat their “bread” or offer to share.

Some experts argue that with their prey they show people the shortcomings of their diet. There were cases that in times of famine, animals began to carry caught sparrows and pigeons into the house, feeding their emaciated owners.

Today, this behavior is difficult to understand, seeing carefully laid out bears on the doorstep or a strangled rat on the pillow. Accept that they are also capable of taking care of us if they consider it necessary, animals are waiting for approval...

Provide your cat with an enriched environment

To live a full life at home, cats need resources. Here are the main ones:

  • feed;
  • bowls for food and water;
  • place for tray and filler;
  • place for shelter;
  • observation place;
  • a way to gain new experiences;
  • scratching post;
  • toys;
  • the amount of attention and the time when this attention should be given.

It is important that the cat has a scratching post (or a play set). Climbing and grinding claws is a banal need for representatives of the species.

You can tie a toy on top of the vertical scratching post; the cat will be very interested in hunting for prey and overcoming obstacles on the way to it.

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